The guilt just never ends. One day you want to watch the world self destruct. And then you decide it is time to do something. This then makes you realize you’re a mere human. Wonderful isn't it? When you realize you are nothing but a human. Something that cannot even be seen from the plane.

I don’t know what I’ll say to God when I go to meet him. Oh I’m sorry, I thought everyone was fine. I thought that they already knew you. I thought that their lives were alright. I think he's going to send me straight to hell for this. How can I be where I am and not fulfill what I’m supposed to do? Am I supposed to save the world? Or am I to be like Daniel and friends? And then get sent into the furnace? I want to go back into my shell and think that everything is alright. Hiding may not solve the problem but at least I do not need to look at the problem and it becomes less of a problem.

But that's not who I want to be. If I do stay a tortoise, I will not be the faithful servant I want to be.