Sunday, March 12, 2006

o well..

been realli depressed again lately.. still cant figure out why.. but hey.. getting depressed onli wastes my brain cells.. not like i haf any left.. memory is getting worse.. time to do smth abt tt..

earthli frens cant last (no offence to anyone at all).. as much as they would love to.. cos we're all so busy, all so caught up in our own pain tt sometimes, listening to someone else's pain onli adds on to ur own.. i noe how tt feels.. its so wonderful to have a fren who onli makes u smile.. but im no such fren.. so ya.. its time to make God my best fren.. tell Him everything.. tho i guess its hard to shake the habit of starting a prayer with "dear LORD," cos calling someone Lord doesnt exactly contribute to the frenly image=p

im very tempted to quit everything that i have now.. my tuition job, worship leading, youth leader, even being a sister, n concentrate on studies. i have too much to do, too little time. thank God for times on the bus when i cant sleep n i haf to resort to toking to God. helps me think thru tings n reali allow time for God to reply. being a quitter is human, drawing strength from God, tt makes a child of God. GOd loves me n has given me too much for me to short change him n take away wat belongs to him (me). yes its tiring to do so much, but hey.. even christ felt tired having to heal so many pple, but he still did it. he jus prayed alot n tok to GOd alot to draw strength. i shall learn tt. however i haf to state tt quitting all those jobs now.. is mainly cos i dun wan anymore titles. i wanna learn to serve without titles, like jus a handy man.. cos titles can make me serve out of duty, not out of love or willingness. however one question remains: is tt possible? hard to tell.

stop harping on wat u do not have n give thanks for wat u haf. smth i got while daydreaming on the bus.

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